The problem with the word "smart" - Part III
(See Part I, Part II)
When people use the word "smart" to describe other people it is often to hide who they are really talking about: themselves.
1) My friend liked my idea and she is really smart.
2) The consultant we worked with is incredibly smart.
3) My boss is so smart.
2) The consultant we worked with is incredibly smart.
3) My boss is so smart.
For each example above, hear what is actually being said.
1) Transitive property, they are smart and they think I am too.
2) We are uncertain about the future and we need to trust this person that their analysis is correct.
3) Again, transitive property, we are seeking to validate ourselves. My boss chose to hire me so therefore I'm smart too.
Often we are seeking to validate our need for confirmation bias and feel good about past decisions we've made.
Instead of masking your praise with the throw away statement of "smart", choose to simply name the traits you genuinely appreciate about this person. [Hard working, quickly processes information, has diverse experiences to draw from, has deep technical skill, etc]
1) Transitive property, they are smart and they think I am too.
2) We are uncertain about the future and we need to trust this person that their analysis is correct.
3) Again, transitive property, we are seeking to validate ourselves. My boss chose to hire me so therefore I'm smart too.
Often we are seeking to validate our need for confirmation bias and feel good about past decisions we've made.
Instead of masking your praise with the throw away statement of "smart", choose to simply name the traits you genuinely appreciate about this person. [Hard working, quickly processes information, has diverse experiences to draw from, has deep technical skill, etc]
